Living life as a 'criminal' to living the life of my dreams
November 15th I celebrate 2 years of sobriety from alcohol 🎊
I forget how far I’ve come and all that I have had to overcome to be where I am today.
Can you relate?
So often we become so forward thinking, taking action, moving forward into our newly empowered life, we forget exactly how far we have walked in our journey.
Leslie, my partner asked me a very powerful question this morning during breakfast that took me back down memory lane causing me to reflect on my transformational journey.
Leslie asked me, “Is it hard for you to not drink?”
I responded, “No it’s easy. I just don’t drink.”
Then she asked, “So what made you stop drinking this time versus all the other attempts?”
I had to stop and really think and reflect on my journey. Past memories and experiences came through that I haven’t thought about in a long time.
I’ve been arrested a dozen times with my first arrest being at age 15 (2005). I’ve had a few MIC’s between the ages of 15-20. My behavior caused me to be put in rehab at the age of 17. I was kicked out of high school because of my anger problem and fighting. I’ve had 2 DUI’s with my first one at the age of 19 then again, my last arrest, at age 22 (2012). Through all of this, I’ve been in and out of jail and a couple other arrests somewhere along the way. Every time I have been arrested, I have been under the influence of alcohol.
You’d think I would have stopped drinking a long time ago.
But why didn’t I stop drinking?
Because it wasn’t my time. I wasn’t learning the lessons that God was putting me through. I wasn’t receiving the insights and wisdom life was attempting to teach me.
I was living unconsciously. I was in denial. I didn’t see I had a problem. I was afraid to look at the shadows of my darkness that was suppressed within me. I blamed other people, circumstances and alcohol. I didn’t take responsibility. I believed I didn’t have a choice for how my life was going. I believed I didn’t deserve any better. I didn’t believe in a higher power, God. I believed this was fate.
During my last sessions of counseling back in 2013, I remember sitting with a group of people. I looked around at all the other people. I listened to them share why they were there - Theft & armed robbery, drug addictions, assault, DUI’s - and no one accepted responsibility for why they were there.
I realized, in a moment, “This is not me. This is not who I am. I am meant for so much more in life.”
In this moment, I decided to take responsibility. I began to own the way my life was going. I realized I am the only one responsible for my thoughts, emotions, language, behaviors, actions and results.
Ever since I took responsibility in my life and learned to face and accept my shadows within me causing me to totally rewire my belief system. As I rewired these belief systems I took on as truth throughout my life I transformed the way I see and live. I became conscious for the way I choose to design my one and only adventurous life.
I am so thankful for all the lessons, adversities and challenges I have had to overcome because it has created the courageous person I am today.
I am so grateful for this amazing journey in Living the Adventures of Life with love, freedom and passion.
Instead of wishing we could change our past experience, we have the freedom to choose our relationship to whatever it was, and that is the beginning in building power, the beginning of creating a new possibility (new reality)
Take a look at an area of your life...
Maybe it's your eating habits....exercise routine...your relationship with a family member...your choice in your career....politics...traffic...other people...yourself
How can you take responsibility in this area to put yourself in a position of power to create a change?
Where are you blaming other people and circumstances for the way they are showing up in your life?
Once we identify, accept and own responsibility, that is when we have the power to cause transformation.
Transformation = changing form =designing a new reality = new experience of life
The first step to a new experience of life is to use the power of responsibility